Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Foot in mouth disease

It's a shame Gwynnie. But, if there was an instance of someone less worth giving a toss about than you, it could only be Posh Spice. So I did my best to ignore yesterday's media hype about the Portuguese translation service mixing up your Spanglish and reporting that you said "The British are much more intelligent and civilised than the Americans" when you really said "Europe is older than America". Because somehow that is more inspired and less smacking of cultural reductionism. And I really was going to dismiss your inane babble, until you called yourself a 'New Yorker' (move over Woody Allen, Gwynnie represents the 'real' Manhattan) and thought that would go unchallenged (because most New Yorkers I know were actually raised in Santa Monica).

Look, it's not as if I know you or anything, but somehow I can't forget that just last year you called the UK rubbish. And the year before that you condemned America as too American. If only you weren't such a boring, macrobiotic teetotaler this could have been your career saving mea culpa. You could have reduced the inconsistencies to drunk talk and been welcomed on both shores. Because Britain loves a drinker and America loves a repenter. But nobody loves a back peddling do-gooder.

Never mind Gwynnie, at least your husband is a hot play:


28 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What an idiot. Why hasn't she and all of the other 250 million of you learned that nobody gives a monkey's arse what any American has to say about anywhere.
Just go home the lot of you.

4:33 pm  
Anonymous Ella said...

Er, then why are you reading and taking the time to comment on City Slicker's blog?

4:34 pm  
Anonymous honkman said...

Oh goody I was just about up for a fight today...gloves off everybody!

4:36 pm  
Anonymous Hels said...

Great clip. So funny "Gwyneth is making drumsticks"

LOL :-)

4:38 pm  
Anonymous Gail said...

She is a woman yuou just love to hate. What imbecile comments. Europe is older than America??!!! That must be a typo. Surely?

4:48 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What does Madge make of this mess? Aren't they best mates over here?

5:11 pm  
Anonymous Tanya said...

Can I add Katie Holmes to your 'dont give a toss about' list?

5:14 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gwynnie is a bad apple but not from the Big Apple all right.

That's "Apple" is in "not Microsoft" ... NOT as in: Gwyneth Paltrow's child, Fiona Apple, or in what a child used to give to their teacher to thank them for giving them a good education.

5:15 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Chris Martin = World's Sexiest Vegetarian

5:18 pm  
Anonymous HeartyBowl said...

Anonymous -
I am afraid not all americans are ignorant, every country suffers from the problem, the main problem is when the ignorant american also happens to be a loud american, which compounds the problem and lets others (usually a lot) know of their affliction. Often will carry on about how america saved the world in wwII, but forgets to mention the reason why the majority of troops involved in the d-day landings were american- the allies had been fighting the war for more than a few years and had run out of men!

I heard an ignorant american once ask "what country is europe in?"

Gwynnie darling is no different. Money helps breed ignornace as well.

5:22 pm  
Anonymous Nat said...

Please add to the "don't give a toss list" - Britney Spears.
Please put it away.

5:24 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where are her PR people?

5:29 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great last line CS.
the scale does seem a bit more weighed on the side of Brits being far more interested in the US than the other way around.
more british moaning & negativity mr/ms anonymous...maybe if people got off their rears and fixed teh trains/NHS/schools/crime..tere might be less to moan about and then all you'd have to discuss is Posh Spice & housing prices

5:29 pm  
Anonymous Keith said...

Best Extras episode ever

thank you CS!

5:33 pm  
Anonymous Jay said...

"What are you doing here, in a factory in Wigan? It's mental".
"Well this is going to sound absolutely ridiculous, but do you mind performing a song for us?"

How cool was that delivery?

5:34 pm  
Anonymous Dan Farming said...

LOUD and brash, in gawdy garb and baseball caps, shuffling between tourist sites or preparing to negotiate a business deal, they bemoan the failings of the world outside the United States = the AMERICAN ABROAD.

GO HOME PALTROW

London doesn't need your trashings.

5:44 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

fantastic

wicked blog here

6:06 pm  
Anonymous Francine said...

So true Americans do love a redemption story. Unless you are OJ and push it that extra inch.

6:13 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL ;-)

missed this episode
so funny

6:15 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

two words = damn yanks

7:26 pm  
Anonymous Benj said...

This YouTube clip is awesome

Why did such a cool artist marry such a pillock?

7:27 pm  
Blogger Steve On Broadway (SOB) said...

Where Blythe Danner when you (or more precisely Gwyneth and Chris) need her?

9:44 pm  
Anonymous Paula said...

Perhaps the look-down-her-nose attitude that Paltrow has is more a reflection of the people she grew up around and chose to associate with as an adult than the ‘typical’ American.

Come on over for dinner sometime Gwynnie. We won’t talk about our work if you don’t talk about yours. We won’t talk about money if you don’t. We can talk about new roofs, and kitchen renovations. We can gossip about Brad and Angelina and Jen.

I’ll make steak & kidney pie and pull you a Guiness.

11:26 am  
Anonymous Fresh said...

Oh dear Gwynnie....life must be so hard. She earned a reported $750,000 for Shakespeare in Love. She earned $10,000,000 (that’s ten million dollars) for View from the Top (which, I have to say, I have never heard of). She also reported purchased a $1.26 million luxury apartment in London in 2002 - before marriage and kids. She and her husband, Chris Martin, purchased a home in 2004 for a reported $5.7 million.

Glad she’s not capitalistic or anything.

11:27 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okie dokie Gwynnie.

I’ve never been a Paltrow fan. I think her head in a box in Se7en was her finest acting moment, but I digress. Perhaps she was telling the truth about being misinterpretted, I don’t know.

11:27 am  
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